Dating the Alpha Female

Posted by Amber Kelleher on Oct 23, 2010 5:20:00 AM

At Kelleher International we bring together the most successful singles across business, sports, entertainment, education and philanthropy. It’s thrilling to work with leaders from every corner of the globe and help them find “the One”. There are dozens of books and whole schools of psychology around the “Alpha Male” and

what makes them tick, and our network is full of these incredibly successful men.

But our network is also full of wildly accomplished women. Whether they are TV Anchors, entrepreneurs, UN delegates or Heads of Surgery, they are at the top of their games and similarly deserve the title “Alpha Female”.

Are there different considerations when dating Alpha Males vs. Alpha Females? An important part of a Kelleher International membership is relationship coaching, especially in the early stages of new love, and we work closely with our members to identify great matches and then light the spark romance. So what advice do we give our top men as they begin to date the Alpha Female?

  1. Don’t Assume that the “Alpha” mentality defines every aspect of her life: while it’s true that many Alpha Males are also extreme athletes, adventure vacationers and collectors of the “best” of everything, the Alpha Female may follow a different pattern. Her Alpha may be only professional, but in a relationship she seeks equal partnership. She may enjoy beautiful Tahiti sunsets to the challenge of K2, or a drive through the Fall trees instead of a 10 mile bike ride. There are no universal truths, but as you approach the relationship, do not jump the conclusion that she is 100% Alpha.
  2. Don’t mistake self-sufficiency for not wanting someone to depend on or to pay attention to her: She may have been incredibly successful on many fronts and is a self-made winner, but that doesn’t mean that she isn’t seeking a strong male. Centuries of conditioning have built into female DNA to seek the Provider and Protector. No matter what her success, it is hard to fight hundreds of years of evolution. What does that mean for you? Don’t hesitate to take the lead on making plans (every woman loves a man with a plan), don’t hesitate to open the door for her, do exhibit your virility in the right circumstance.
  3. Let her play down her success if she wants to: if she doesn’t want to talk about her many successes, do not take this as a sign that she doesn’t want to share, or that she is shy or even overly humble. Just like she can’t find centuries of evolution, she also knows that men can’t fight that either. There is nothing inherently feminine about great success (although they are not in conflict in any way) and hundreds of years have carved into men’s DNA certain characteristics that she may choose to emphasize over her success. She may choose to seem more nurturing than domineering, more sensual than aggressive – let her be who she wants to be and don’t define her by her Alpha status.

Great singles come together to make great couples, and at Kelleher International we see elite “Alphas” of all flavors come together and find a lifetime of happiness. Are you one? Call us and see if we have the match for you!!

Next Time: Are you an Alpha Female? Tips on finding Love....


Topics: Relationships

Whether you are a new client flying off to Paris for your first match or have been happily married for more than twenty years, Kelleher International wants to be your resource to make your journey of love wildly fulfilling, exciting, dynamic, and deeply passionate.

We’ll talk about strategies for dating success, navigating relationship land mines, and the mindset it takes to find love and make it blossom.  We will put current events in the context of seeking love and even give you a little window into the match making business and how a centuries-old tradition continues to evolve in our modern world.  The “right one” is out there for you, so check back weekly for updates or follow us on Twitter to make the most of our partnership in your future.

Let us come with you on your journey!

Jill & Amber