We only went on our first date a few weeks ago and he’s already suggesting a weekend getaway. It seems “too soon” to me, but I don’t want to do anything to stop the momentum of our relationship. Do I agree to go?
You’ve touched on a very important part of emerging relationships – everyone “progresses” at a different rate, and everyone places different milestones at progress points in a relationship. You may believe that the weekend away is a big step and is inappropriate at this stage, and he may think it’s no big deal at any stage. Likewise, you may think a night out with him and your friends doesn’t mean anything, and he could perceive it as a big test that determines the future of your relationship.
We have a constant mantra of “openness” in relationships here at Kelleher International, and so our top recommendation will always be to address the issue head-on and get it out in the open. We believe that any threat to “momentum” from bringing up a tough issue is always more than offset by the acceleration in a relationship that real honesty brings.
You could suggest that you “usually don’t go away with a man” so soon after you’ve met, and still agree to the trip – this will set a good tone and some potential ground rules for the weekend. If this doesn’t feel right, you could also suggest a weekend further out in the future that is more in line with your internal guide. Whichever path you choose, direct communication will always be your best choice.