The Day After...

Posted by Amber Kelleher on Mar 12, 2012 12:35:00 PM

You've had a great date.

You want to tell her what a great time you had and set your next rendez vous, but you know there's some value in "the chase" (both directions) and you don't want to blow it by seeming too eager.

You also don't want to get caught up in the "games" of dating.

Our belief is very straightforward -- you will gain more by showing clear interest and that your side of the chase "is on" than you risk in showing yourself too eager, too soon. Most of these rules were set in your 20s, when many of us were only interested in "dating" and nothing more than that. If you are serious about finding "The One", then new rules apply.

Rule #1: No texting. Whether you are 22 years old or 62 the text message format lacks all gravitas and positive impact. It sends a message that you were only willing to spend 5 seconds to tell her "u hd a gd time". At most it elicits another 140 character response which is not what you need to push forward.

Guideline #1: pick up the phone. While email isn't the worst way to communicate, and it reduces awkwardness risk, phone adds the extra impact of the sound of your voice and the weight of "I was willing to commit an open amount of time". When you layer on top of this the high percent of calls that go to voicemail, the phone call is the best medium.

Recommendation #1: Keep it short and simple with a planned sign-off.

Fill in the blanks...

[insert her name], this is [insert your name], I wanted to call and thank you again for a great evening last night. I've been replaying that conversation we had about [insert conversation] and today it's got me really thinking about [something you will do].

{VOICEMAIL CLOSING}

I'd love to continue this conversation, I'll give you a call [later today][tomorrow] and maybe we can plan another night out. I'll talk to you soon, [insert name]

{LIVE PERSON CLOSING}

\Have a plan in mind for your next potential date -- women love a man with a plan\

[Insert plan, e.g., "Theres a great new sushi restaurant I've been meaning to hit for weeks", or "There's a incredible tenor saxophonist at the Blue Note this Friday"], shall we continue the conversation this [insert day of next date].

Then wrat it up.

Don't make the follow up any more complicated than it needs to be and always err on the side of removing any questions she might have in her mind as to your interest.

Topics: Relationships

Whether you are a new client flying off to Paris for your first match or have been happily married for more than twenty years, Kelleher International wants to be your resource to make your journey of love wildly fulfilling, exciting, dynamic, and deeply passionate.

We’ll talk about strategies for dating success, navigating relationship land mines, and the mindset it takes to find love and make it blossom.  We will put current events in the context of seeking love and even give you a little window into the match making business and how a centuries-old tradition continues to evolve in our modern world.  The “right one” is out there for you, so check back weekly for updates or follow us on Twitter to make the most of our partnership in your future.

Let us come with you on your journey!

Jill & Amber