There are no such things as stereotypes...

Posted by Amber Kelleher on Mar 28, 2011 1:00:00 AM

"He was too much of a bad boy." "She seemed like a total princess." "He is still a Momma's boy."

It's natural to put a "name" or a "label" on something. It's the only way that humans are able to process all of the information they receive everyday -- by taking shortcuts to classifying new data.

This is dangerous and destructive when it comes to dating.

It's fun to read dating articles that tell us to look out for "Peter Pans" or "Drama Queens" or a host of other archetypes to describe the ocean of singles, but we set ourselves up for failure if we put too much faith in the descriptions. Almost no one is a pure "type", and if we use just a few indications to toss someone into a general group, then we may be cheating ourselves of a great opportunity. Let's say you meet a guy who plays tennis every Saturday with his college roommate and hasn't missed a home Broncos game in ten years. You could easily jump to "Frat Boy" and extrapolate to immature, lack-of-ambition and aspiring alcoholic. You could just as easily jump to "passionately loyal" and "forms long-term friendships". Both are valid -- which one of these sounds like someone you might want to be with? It works both ways. Let's say your date asks for dressing-on-the-side and says she could never share her apartment in the city with a dog. Is this "High Maintenance" or is it "works hard to look good" and "believes it's cruel to subject a dog to city life"?

Here's the punch line for both genders -- "typing" men and women should be a leisure activity to throw a fun light on dating, but in the real world of meeting people and exploring new relationships will only close you off to opportunities.

Topics: Relationships

Whether you are a new client flying off to Paris for your first match or have been happily married for more than twenty years, Kelleher International wants to be your resource to make your journey of love wildly fulfilling, exciting, dynamic, and deeply passionate.

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Jill & Amber