This week at Kelleher International, we’re celebrating two of our veteran matchmakers. Pamela Nolen and Nilda Renteria have been leading the charge in our Dallas office for ten years. We asked these matchmaking mavens to reflect on the importance of their role as matchmakers and to share some basic do’s and don’ts to get the most out of your next dating experience.
“Matchmaking is needed now more than ever,” Pam began. “I’m not sure people's lives could get busier than they are in this day and age which limits the time and energy one has for being open to the possibility of love.”
Matchmaking not only offers the opportunity to hand over the responsibilities of finding potential mates but also provides a coach and wingman of sorts to help wade through the uncertainty and capitalize on the possibilities as they arise.
When asked to explain their success as seasoned matchmakers Pam said, “I have a deep love for helping people by sharing what I have learned over the years. I'm an empathic and compassionate listener.” Nilda attributes her success to being persistent in both finding matches for her clients and coaching them through the process.
On a fundamental level, the more things change in life and love, the more they stay the same. “Over the years I’ve found everyone just wants to be loved and know that someone cares for them,” Pam explained.
Ambitiously striving for success is a noble attribute, but it needs to take a back seat when it comes to love. “That business mentality doesn’t work the same for love which is difficult for most of our executive clients to grasp. In personal relationships you’ll win when you’re able to relax and let things be,” she added.
Based on Pamela and Nilda’s collective matchmaking know-how, here are five quick tips to help you get the most out of your next dating experience.
- Don’t engage in lengthy phone, text, or social conversations before meeting your date for the first time. We tend to begin pre-judging a person before we ever meet them. A clean slate free of assumptions is best.
- Don’t talk about your ex. There’s no reason for any exes to come up in first date conversation. Or second or third date conversation for that matter. Be here now!
- Keep it light! Your primary focus should be on having fun while getting to know someone new. You're on a date, not a job interview so relax and don’t overthink things. Dig deep to find your youthful teenage spirit; adults can be silly and giddy, too.
- Keep an open mind; you don’t know how the story ends. Nilda once had a male client decline a second date with a potential match only to meet her again out in the wild. Now they’re engaged. An open mind is a playground for possibility. Anything can happen if you show up as your best self and don’t try to control the situation.
- Chemistry is the X Factor. We have preconceived notions of who our person is and in what package they’ll arrive, but looks, education, personality, and success don’t hold a candle to chemistry. Relax and let it flow.
What about you? Are you a busy professional looking for love in all the wrong places? Are you guilty of making some of the dating mistakes Nilda and Pam highlighted? If you’re curious to learn more about matchmaking and how our team can enhance your search for love, please contact us to find out more. We’ll shine a light on our process, next steps, and prepare you for your personal journey to love.