If we eliminate the ego’s race for wealth, fame, and fortune and drill down to our core desires as human beings, we all want the same things - To feel joy, love, and inclusion. As matchmakers, one of the most important elements of our job is to help you get out of your own way so you can realize those things.
The Law of Attraction can be your biggest friend or foe. It depends on where you stand on the idea that you are a powerful creator whose thoughts influence your reality. Many reject the idea that they control their destiny and discount the Law of Attraction as hokey. But, it's as real as the Law of Gravity.
We get that it’s a big responsibility to accept the notion and quite another to put it into practice. To help you dive in, the Kelleher International matchmakers have assembled the easiest, direct path to attaining what your desire.
Taking a few moments each day to relax your mind is essential for clarity, focus, and a healthy mind. We often spend so much time thinking and talking about the things we don’t want that we lose sight of what we actually desire. Meditation provides the space to bring you back to center and connect with your inner thoughts and desires.
If quieting the mind is challenging for you, we recommend the Headspace app. It is a meditation companion with themed sessions - from stress to relationships to balance and beyond - designed for beginners or those building their meditation practice and seeking guidance.
KI Matchmaker Meditation Tip:
Set aside five to ten minutes before a date to declutter your mind and set your intention. What do you hope for the evening? How will you show up and represent yourself to make that happen?
Know exactly what you want. Nevermind the package it comes in, focus on the feelings you want to feel. Is it love and togetherness or the desire to nurture, protect and feel needed? Whatever it is, take a few moments when you go to bed each night to see yourself in a scenario feeling those feelings. Play it out in your mind like a scene in your very own movie. Let what you most desire be your last image before you go to sleep.
KI Matchmaker Visualization Tip:
During your pre-date meditation, visualize the upcoming first meeting with your potential match. See your confident, charismatic self effortlessly making conversation and moving with grace and ease. In your mind’s eye see yourself being charming and funny as you tell a story that reveals something about you and endears you to your date. You’ve got this. Dating is a breeze.
Just like taking notes in an important meeting or planning an event months before it happens, conscious effort sets you up for success. It’s critical to check in with yourself periodically throughout the day. It doesn’t require a lot of time, but it does call for a healthy dose of mindfulness. Was my comment constructive? Am I defensive? Where is she coming from on this deal? Was my reaction appropriate? Consistently making sure your thoughts and actions are “above the line” means you’re engaging consciously and your best self is on display.
KI Matchmaker Mindfulness Tip:
First impressions are deep-rooted so on a date, frequently checking in with yourself is important. Unfortunately, on a first date, you have a small window of time to make a lasting impact. Did the interaction start out well, but take a turn? If you’re mindful, you can likely observe what’s about to happen and correct, clarify and make room for open, authentic dialogue if things are starting to go off the rails. Getting to know someone can be tricky, but the willingness to stay open and surf the waves of information and emotions as they come is vital to building rapport.
Things don’t always go our way. It’s not supposed to. But when life is handing you lemons by the pound it’s imperative to seek out things in your life to show gratitude. When things go wrong, focus on what is going right. Find reasons to be grateful and shift your perspective to see the good in the ugly. Be grateful for the experience. Feel and acknowledge your feelings and look forward to what comes next.
KI Matchmaker Post-Date Tip:
At the end of a date, take a few minutes to do a quick post-mortem in your mind. How is your energy level after just leaving the person? Do you feel energized and satiated or drained and exasperated? What feelings did this person bring out in you? Did you feel challenged positively or negatively? Seeking inner clarity will help you articulate the dating experience to your Kelleher matchmaker in your post-date follow-up and support both of you in your combined effort to find your authentic match.
Do you currently practice meditation, visualization, mindfulness, and gratitude? If so, how does it impact your dating life? Do you have any pre- or post-date practices that help you make the most of your experience that you'd like to share with the KI community? Let us know in the comments section below.