As much time as we spend contemplating things, you could say we spend most of our lives living in our own heads. Our relationship with self is the longest and most intimate of any we will ever have, and it’s the one we should always trust the most. That inner voice, sometimes referred to as our “larger self” helps us navigate through life and establish our values. Unfortunately, it can also cause quite a bit of over-thinking when it comes to love.
Complete certainty, when it comes to love, is impossible. Humans are crazy creatures, constantly making decisions, experiencing things, growing and evolving on a never ending loop. When two of these humans get together, they’re both on their own wheel of evolution attempting to move in sync with their partners. You can see how expecting certainty in that situation is quite impractical. So what does that mean for you? You have to embrace uncertainty. It’s scary, and sometimes painful, but more often than not, it’s exhilarating, life-affirming, and exactly where the magic happens.
Follow these tips from our matchmakers to banish some of the biggest bi-products of uncertainty and let your love shine!
Conquer Your Fear
Uncertainty breeds self-doubt and over-thinking. Fear of failure, heartbreak, or not being good enough are three pretty common pests that can plague your psyche and chances of having a healthy relationship. The simple, but not-so-easy solution is the same for all - embrace uncertainty.
When you accept that you can’t possibly know what’s going to happen, you no longer have a baseline to judge yourself or your partner. You can’t forecast on a calendar at what stage you should be meeting each other’s families, or shopping for real estate, or picking out wedding rings. When you admit that you have no idea how the story ends, you free yourself up to be present in the moment, and let whatever will be organically unfold.
Society has programmed us to believe that we’re less valuable without a partner - that a pair is better than one. At Kelleher International, we do believe life is meant to be shared, but before you can share yourself with another, you must love yourself consistently and fiercely. There’s no room for uncertainty here as your happiness depends on you being steadfast in your own self-worth. Before another can love you, they must be inspired by what you’re reflecting. Are you radiating confidence and joy? Or is that jealousy and fear seeping out of your pores? Hint: Whatever it is, you can’t hide it!
Meditation is an excellent tool in honing your inner-voice and offering the internal space to work through those self-depleting images in your head and any negative self-talk. The Tibetan word ding is the unmistakable feeling of being at home within yourself and feeling comfortable within your skin. We like that. Strive to get there!
Ding ding ding!
When you’re willing to consistently embrace uncertainty while loving yourself completely - you’re primed to be a rock star partner. In this space, your capacity to love and accept others as they are is so much greater and the experiences you share are much richer. How? Without the need to force-plan the future and know exactly how things will go, you can confidently find a partner who is willing to do the same. Two people putting in the effort to accept responsibility for their own actions and creating their personal happiness will always share a healthy, meaningful journey.
If you’re ready to embrace uncertainty, work on yourself, and find meaningful love and a healthy partnership, contact our matchmakers at Kelleher International today. As experts in love and relationships, you are sure to find someone who will honor and love you - even when you inevitably wake up on the wrong side of the bed.
Call today, we’re here to assist!